Flash (way too) back


Sitting at home, especially thinking about what to do next, though never really wants to find the next task, can be awfully stressful!

Only talent you need is the patience to do nothing and contemplate the next possible ‘nothing’ and think how stressful it is. While a specific set of people are always successful in this art, the often-mistaken identity of this exercise is that you will be heinously criticised as being lazy, unproductive and possible mental health humiliation. All for the very innocent gaze you can offer back! Now, tell me if it does not seem stressful to you. (Wanted to add the expression “my foot” here for no reason but thought of the legendary writer Kamala Das who once expressed the same and a paparazzi being concerned for her and asked ‘Mam, what happened to your foot’!)

Well, in one of those blissful – above mentioned state of mind, I was trying to pull the ‘when I was in America’ days. Needless to mention, it is always beautiful to dig from the past since you don’t have to at least physically strain while doing so and it is emotionally appealing, snowy and….. Oh wait, I know for some of you it might remind the irritating itchy white skin on your leg due to the cold weather. After all, Indian men consider using moisturizers too feminine than being called the Mom’s lad. So, we stay ‘Mard’ (Man) by sneakily scratching the leg in between the client meetings, imitating the ostrich trick and strongly believing that no one is noticing 😊.

To get back to our thought ‘when I was in America’, now that the vicinity of the picturization is too far, that even if you want to hurt someone, they would never know about it too soon. Thank God, after all the supersonic and modern transport techniques currently prevail, America is still a few long hours far from India had you wish to travel. Gaining overconfidence from all these, the beautiful memories lined up in my mind pushing the one at the front like the limited distribution of government liquor shops in Kerala. Each one wanted to come in first as if the opportunity might get confiscated if someone tries to wake me up. Those beautiful neighborhoods, well-paved walkways, broad roads, what more, even the tree leaves I find better looking hence I’m sure you need no detailing of the hooters!

If your answer was ‘yes’ to the narration of hooters, I am not writing this to you insensitive Bharatvasi (Indian).

I was swimming like a dolphin in the memories, slowly jumping out of it, nose diving back into it, breathing the little water umbrella into the sea air etc. etc. As simple as Picture Perfect.

Now here comes a Brit lady (in the memories of course), that too from a very recent dialogue exchange at one of my client visits. By the time I wondered about her role in my American dream, the innocent voice flew out like from thousand trumpets ‘I feel so horrible for what our country has done to you, it was total exploitation. I am sorry’.  Immediately the chivalry shook its fur in me like a lion and I told her, ‘It’s absolutely fine. Europe always had a superior lifestyle that every Indian wants to be a part of’. Before I could spread out my American experience for her comfort and my secret satisfaction of letting her know that once I was in there (that I am a superior Indian unlike others around me during the incident), she said ‘no, India always had it. You had a much more open culture than Europe. It is evident from the book of Kamasutra. It was written way back than Europe could even think of such a thing’.  

What crap. Shoot! I hate these doing nothing times.

It is so stupid, lazy, unproductive and possible mental health humiliation! I am no jobless. Let me at least make a lemon tea, truly Indian style, and get back to work.

3 thoughts on “Flash (way too) back

    1. Absolutely, when the lock down started I used to think it is totally nice and less work. But within a week realised that is not the case. Thinking becomes beautiful when the mind and body is active.

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